The journey of a thousand miles begins with...the perfect pair of shoes.

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Poop in the mail and on the stairs: Random Thoughts Tuesday


Oh, sweet Tuesday. You rock my world. Shall we?

*Mr. HH and I have a deal when it comes to the dogs. I take them in the morning and he takes them before bed. Indy takes them during the day and gets an allowance for doing so, but that's not part of the story. We've had quite a bit of snow here lately (especially yesterday) and when you're only a few inches off the ground, well, apparently it sucks. Last night when Mr. HH took them out, they were less than happy. Pepper wouldn't even go down the outside set of steps and decided to pee on the landing. Dutch and Arf quickly went down the steps, peed on the big mound of snow where the sidewalk had been shoveled and ran back up. They knew they were going to bed and quickly ran up the 3 flights of steps to our apartment anticipating the warmth of the bed. Arf got to the top flight, he suddenly decided he needed to do more than just pee and took a poop right outside the door. Mr. HH was incredulous. I was wiping tears of mirth from my eyes. The look on Mr. HH's face was priceless. And honestly, Arf is all of about 5 inches from the ground. There are at least 6 inches of snow. I can't really say I blame him. I'm just glad it happened on Mr. HH's watch instead of mine.

*My readers are super awesome. You knew that though, right? All the responses I got on yesterday's post about eating a big slice of cake gives me hope. All those "oh, I couldn't eat a whole piece" people can stuff it. In their face. :)

*The roads here went black (we have a color code for safety-green, amber, red, black) just as it was time for people to get off work. I the roads go black all non-essential personnel are to go home. Despite the fact that it snowed non-stop all day yesterday, they didn't turn them black until 4:50pm. Nice.

*All these Wall Street bonuses are pissing me off.

*Indy went to the German doctor on Friday. It was an experience vastly different from the ones we're used to. We waited all of about 5 minutes (What?) before being ushered back to a bright exam room with floor to ceiling windows. The nurse weighted Indy and checked his height (65lbs, 53.5 inches) and stayed with us. The doctor popped in within a minute of her taking Indy's vitals and asked Indy what was wrong. Not me; Indy. Interesting. They talked for a while and then the doctor asked me a few questions and examined Indy. He decided to rule out some internal diseases (the kids has serious chronic digestive issues) and needed blood. There was no lab shuffle or phlebotomist. The doctor drew the blood himself! How odd. The doctor told me he needed a stool sample. I may have wretched a little in my mouth at the thought. Fantastic. He handed me a little vial with a scoop looking thing attached to the inside of the cap. He told me once I had the sample, just to seal the vial and DROP IT IN THE MAIL! I was dumbstruck. I asked him if it was legal to mail that. He looked at me like I had lost my mind and said "Yes, why not?" Well, hot doctor (Did I mention he was hot? No? Well, he was!) because I'm pretty sure it's against the law in the US and I can't imagine that it's legal in Europe. It's poop! I do NOT need to spend time in a German prison for mailing a hazardous substance. He looked at the nurse who was laughing and said something in rapid fire German (though I understood some of it-he was questioning her if he was wrong) and she looked at me and assured me, that yes, I could put it in the mail and that no, it was not illegal in Germany. Weird!

*I can honestly say I never ever, ever wished I were an Oscar Meyer Wiener Just sayin.

*Where's my bonus?

*Pepsi is the devil. The sweet, delicious, mouth watering devil.

*Mark McGuire is a putz.

*I got an email the other day about Ed Freeman. He passed away in mid-2008. Have you ever heard of him? Probably not. He was a Medal of Honor recipient who was awarded the MOH for his heroic action during Vietnam. He and his commander flew their unarmed helicopter into an area that medical evac helicopters refused to fly into due to the heavy enemy fire. They flew 14 flights through enemy fire bringing water and supplies and removing the wounded. This man (and the commander who flew with him, Bruce Crandall) are American heroes, yet how much air time did his death get? How much time did Michael Jackson's get? There is something seriously wrong with our country.

*Hmmmm....funny sign, funny sign, let me go find one. Ah, here we go! Big props to you St. Cyril. I loves me a truly funny church sign. Enjoy.

Go check out the UnMom for all the other randomness.


Stacy Uncorked said...

The whole scenario about the dogs cracked me up - I'd be glad that poop situation happened on HH's watch, too... ;)

Nothing like waiting until the end of the day to declare the roads in 'black' status. Especially since it had been snowing all day!

The doctor experience does sound vastly different than the US. Here's hoping the hot doctor will figure things out from the mailed poop. ;)

I got the Ed Freeman email, too - I agree there's something seriously wrong with our country.

Random Tuesday Trivia

Unknown said...

Amazing thing those stool sample jars. I worked at a restaurant that had some sort of outbreak to which we were required to give a stool sample. I turned mine in only to hear I had to do it again… luckily it was my last day, so I took the vile and kept it.

Thank you for your randomness,

Bonita said...

For the record, it is legal to mail poop in the US too; they will even come to your doorstep and pick it up for you. Don't ask me how I know.

Yes, we have our heroes all wrong. I'd never even heard that heroic story before. Sad.

Cute sign!

Toni said...

Oh to wait FIVE minutes in waiting room for a doctor! That's great!

Happy RTT!

Formerly known as Frau said...

I love your randomness! Haven't experienced German doctor yet...knock on wood. I hope Indy gets to feeling better soon. My dog would poop any where I always worry when on Sbahn could you imagine!

Rue said...

Hey sweet lady :)

That sign is hilarious!

I'm glad Indy is okay, but sending poop in the mail is so wrong. What if it ends up at someone's house by accident. Can you imagine opening that up? LOLOLOL


Emily said...

The Mark McGuire thing is really random...I hadn't thought about him in years.

Amanda @ Serenity Now said...

LMAO at the doctor story.

I think that sign is my favorite so far!

Crazy Shenanigans-JMO said...

That sign just made my day lol

Julia @ Hooked on Houses said...

Oh, my gosh, you crack me up. Thanks for the laugh this morning. I would've asked the same question about mailing poop. Who knew that was legal? I suddenly realized that postal workers are underpaid...

Allison said...

Why does it not surprise me that you can mail poop in Germany?

That sign is funny - I've actually been to that church :)

Anonymous said...

Thanks for yet another incredibly entertaining RTT post!

I'm passing on the award I got from Angelia. I don't know if you're participating, but I'd like to acknowledge your blog! If yes, you'll find the award on my blog

Sarah said...

No one told me the roads went black! I was here until 6:30 Tuesday night. Boooooo.

Also, the story about walking your dogs made me laugh so much that I teared up. Too funny!

Our German doctor experience was similar...I wish that it wasn't a rare thing!! I won't enjoy going back to US doctors and waiting an hour and a half after my appt time to see a physician.

KimAustin said...

Love the dog story! Sounds too familiar, I had the same issue but in Montana where the snow was taller than the dogs! Tell HH and Indy hello for me. I was up by your old homeplace yesterday; u wouldn't recognize the area. I will email you some news later today! Next time u go to a German restaurant, take a picture of the food and show the differences between american and "REAL" german food!

Sandy said...

Great post! I don't know which I enjoyed more....the dogs or the doc.

PS It's not illegal to mail such substance in the US either. I do it all the people I really don't like.

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