If you read my previous post, you know I'm feeling grumpy. The PERFECT time for a Dear So and So. Thank you Kat!
Dear stupid government,
It p!sses me off so much that because of red tape and bureaucracy that Indy can't collect for Haiti. Something so pure and simple shouldn't get bogged down in paperwork. I hate that I had to explain to Indy that sometimes the gov't can make things far more difficult than they have to be. Watching my little boy cry because he can't raise money for the people he sees in pain on TV was hard for me and made me hate my gov't just a little.
Dear lady in Aldi,
Look, I sympathize with you. Keeping a toddler happy while grocery shopping is difficult at best. However the solution is NOT to hand that screaming child a package of raw hamburger. I don't know, it's Germany, it might not have been hamburger, but still. Raw. Meat. Now I know that it is inside one of those weird German plastic packages that you practically need a degree and a tool set to open, but as you found out, kids are bloody geniuses at cracking open the impossible. Your toddler's hands covered in ground meat nearly sent me (and everyone within throwing range) over the edge. I know it's hard to shop when your little one is screaming, but seriously do not cave and hand over raw meat.
Dear teenage girls,
WHY do we have to keep going over this? It. Is. Cold. Put. Some. Damn. Clothes. On. I hope that wasn't too many words for you. Maybe thextese will be simpler: 411 Brrr. Clths On. U lk SSINF.
Dear American Idol,
I have mixed feelings about your return. I'm kind of over you, but like a train wreck, I can't look away. I know it's for entertainment value, but all those deluded people you let into the room? Stop doing that. It's old. We ALL know they have to go through several auditions to get to that point. Don't give the people hope just so they can freak out when the judges tell them they can't sing. If you want to let Pants on the Ground guy Larry Platt (a civil rights hero) back on, I would watch him. Because he was awesome. And his song is amazing and incredibly relevant.
Still watching (and hating myself for it),
Dear obnoxious Americans in the Spanish restaurant,
One of the things we noticed (including Indy) when we visited the States this past summer was how loud restaurants are. Seriously, it's deafening. In Europe (or at least Germany and France), people are quiet when they eat. That's not to say they don't talk, they're just quiet and respect the other diners. You did not. When we arrived at the restaurant at the unfashionably early hour of 7pm, it was deserted and we were okay with that. We ordered, chatted about Spain (we studied Spain this week and considered this a field trip-man I love homeschooling) and enjoyed our Tapas. Around 7:45 you arrived in all your loud American glory. A few other Europeans arrived within 15 or so minutes of you (we knew they were European because they were quiet and all about 12 feet tall-damn those strong genes). We actually felt sorry for them for having to sit near you. Yes, I know you were there to have a good time (there were 6 adults), and I'm okay with that, but take the volume down just a few notches. Everyone in the restaurant is not interested in what you have to say. Trust me. Also, to the mom (we heard one of the younger women call you that), you may sound like Paula Deen, but you talk like a salty old sailor. Holy cow. Mr. HH and I exchanged many a glance over your vocabulary during our paella. The word 'dick' or the sentence 'oh, he's such a dick' is not really polite dinner conversation. Especially if every diner in the entire restaurant can hear you.
Embarrassed for you and my fellow Americans,
Wow, I feel so much better. Well not really. I'm so full of paella I could burst. Thanks for listening and don't forget to click the Hope for Haiti button up there ^^^^^
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