The journey of a thousand miles begins with...the perfect pair of shoes.

Thursday, January 21, 2010

Dear So and So

Dear So and So...

You know I love you, right? Living in Europe, I'm pretty sure I've single-handedly kept you afloat with my purchases over the last 10 or so years (where's my loyalty discount?). You have an excellent selection of just about anything and are willing to ship it quickly. While I appreciate the variety, I think you've gone a bit too far. This ring, while gorgeous, and okay, something I'd personally love to own, is taking it a bit far don't you think? Who exactly are you targeting? I'm pretty sure that the average Amazon shopper is not going to drop $187,000.99 on a ring. I realize that compared to the list price of $338,800.00, you are offering a tremendous bargain, but really? Really? And how do you ship that? Surely you're not entrusting it to the USPS or UPS, are you?


P.S. I completely appreciate that you think I'm wealthy enough to recommend this to me, but I assure you I'm not. Maybe if you extend to me some sort of super purchaser discount? Say 99% off?

Dear Immune System,

You've done a pretty good job so far this season and I really appreciate it, I do, but if you could just kick it up a notch or two for a few days here, I'd really like that. I've been feeling a bit under the weather, and that's really putting us behind on our school schedule. We were supposed to go to Strasbourg today as part of our study of France and I had to cancel. Boo. I was really looking forward to a savory crepe from my favorite little place, Crep Mili. Could you help me out here?


Dear house,

Really? After all the letters I've written to you? You still haven't gotten the message?


Dear Indy,

I love you kiddo. I really, really do, but good heavens can you drive me crazy. I know you want to take care of me since I'm not feeling well and that's really sweet of you, but coming up to me every 5 minutes to see if I need something/feel okay/still have a fever/etc. is just this side of too much. Could you take it down just a smidgen?


Dear Pepper,

You'll be 14 tomorrow. 14! That's really old for a dog. We've known you since you were 6 weeks old and you've held our hearts ever since. I know that aging comes with its issues, but the farting and then getting up to get away from the smell while leaving me to flounder in the funk is not cool. Not cool at all. I still love you tons and tons, but I do NOT love the smell.

Trying to breathe,

Dear lady at the optical shop,

You said my new reading glasses would be in last Saturday or last Tuesday at the latest. It is Friday. I still have no reading glasses. What's up?


Ah, I feel so much better. Got something you need to say or just get off your chest? Write your own Dear So and So's and link them up over at Kat's.


Kat said...

Hope you feel better soon! Sometimes I wish I could take a sick day, but nothing would get done around here. *snort* Who am I kidding? Things never get done around here anyway.

These Are The Days said...

Very funny. Sounds theraputic...I need to try it. Have a great weekend.

Amanda @ Serenity Now said...

Maybe Indy is destined to be a (very concerned) doctor! I wish Amazon thought enough of me to recommend a $$$$ ring. Then again, maybe your purchases have all added up to $$$$ and they thought you'd link to spend your next purchase in one lump sum. ;)

Julia @ Hooked on Houses said...

I love your Dear So and So letters. Too funny about that ring on Amazon.

Hope you feel better soon!

NFAH said...

That Amazon page is amazing. Love it.

Yankee Girl said...

Happy birthday to Pepper! Dogs are the best, aren't they?

Even if they do fart a lot.

Jenny said...

Hope you feel better soon!

I looked at the ring on Amazon. I was surprised to see 22 customer reviews. They are worth reading if you haven't already, some are quite funny.

Happy Birthday Pepper!

Working Mommy said...

Pepper...that is the name of my best friend's that name...too bad the cat hates me :(


Elisa @ Globetrotting in Heels said...

Oh thank you, I was just on the market for a huge diamond ring and was wondering where to get it. Clearly, my search is over. I'll just order it from Amazon and be done with that. It's not like anyone wants to bother checking the clarity and cut when dropping $180,000.

Pfffft. (I am SO not in the market for a diamon ring, BTW. But if they wanted to send it to me free of charge to test their shipping methods, I might be persuaded.)

Sandy said...

So I take it you're not buying the ring?

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